I haven’t blogged in a while because I just don’t feel like it.

Right now the financial aspect of life just sucks and it doesn’t look like it is going to get any better.

I’m tired of being in this place.

I’m tired of thinking things are getting better only to be knocked down.

I’m really tired of hearing that things will work out.

We have always been in a place of need and the one time it looked like we were finally crawling out of a hole we got that rug snatched out from under us.

I hate watching crooked people who don’t believe in a God or even just treating people right, continue to gain in life.

And please don’t tell me that they will get their’s in the end because even though I do believe in a heaven and a hell that doesn’t make me feel better now while I am in the midst of this.

It is May and Jorry hasn’t had a sale of a job yet. Neither has his boss. Guess who will get the axe if they need to cut back?

One customer said to come pick up a check and then called the very next day to cancel the whole project.

Another customer called and said they wouldn’t be able to do anything. When the market took the plunge in response to the stimulis plan another customer called to say that they wouldn’t be able to do anything because they lost half their retirement.

Now I hear that if this cap and trade junk gets pushed through then our state will be one of the hardest hit. Our family would see a $3900.oo a year increase in our utilities.

But wait we are getting that extra $11 a week in my husbands check that should help.

It’s not about being able to buy clothes from a department store or to have a new vehicle.

We shop consignment and goodwill and we did so even when we were making the good money in GA.

We were also snowballing our debt and our van is paid off.

It’s about being able to pay our bills on time. It’s about having a job where we can make ends meet with out depending on assistance.

I don’t want to be here anymore. I’m tired of always needing help. I want to be able to offer the help.

We are good people and yet for some reason we don’t seem to count enough.



9 thoughts on “

  1. Oh, I hate that for you guys.
    It seems so hard to just make sure that everything can get paid sometimes.Like you guys, we do thrift store shopping and try to live within our means. And even then it can be hard sometimes.
    We also choose to buy most things used because of it’s gentler impact on the environment.
    I remember last month when it looked like we weren’t going to have enough money for downpayment on the house — through no fault of our own. I was sad and angry. I didn’t know how to unhitch myself from feeling that way either. And then I remember saying out loud, “I’m a good person. I let people out in traffic all the time!!” And that just made me giggle. It sounds like such an absurd thing to say. It was an absurd moment for me.
    Yes, it is deeply unfair that this financial crisis was put into motion by greed and the greedy. And yet its the people who are just trying to pay the bills and care for their families that are the hardest hurt by it all.
    I will keep you guys in my prayers, as always.

  2. I so understand & am sorry!  We’re right there w/ you.  I wish I had some words of wisdom, but … it’s hard.  You think things are looking up & something ELSE goes wrong or doesn’t come thru like you expect.  As I said… right there w/ ya.  All I can offer is love & ((HUGS)).  Call me if you want to vent in person!

  3. Somehow Ben’s company is doing okay (he’s in construction) but he works around DC where there are so many people who think that no matter what, O is going to save us all.  So they just keep spending and buying.
    I worry b/c if Ben loses his job, I don’t know what we’ll do.  We live paycheck to paycheck now, so we don’t save much.  It’s something i’m working on.  And we shop thrift stores and try to find things we need on freecycle to save $$.  But it’s still hard.  Our utilities went up in Jan and that made a huge difference in what we’re paying out.
    I feel your pain and will say a prayer for you.

  4. I could have written most of that!
    We are struggling, not as bad as we were the past two years but not out of the hole. Our utilities are way to high, we had to do a deal with our mortgage and now owe more than the house is worth.
    Jason is trying to get his business off the ground and work his job and fix cars on the side.
    I know all to well about being in need and wanting to be the one who can help someone else.
    Our grocery bill is outrageous.
    The solution is to make more money.
    Sorry you are down, I know what it’s like and it sucks. We go without so many things.

  5. Same things going on at my house, my husband has been job hunting for 3 weeks now.. I couldn’t even go yard saling last month because we don’t have any money coming in… that’s when it gets really frusterating, when we shop thrifty and then we can’t even do that….  We must keep our chins up~

  6. (((hug))) we have been there for 10 years of marriage. I totally understand what you are saying. I have no wonderful life altering advise… but I so understand how it gets you down and low.

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