October has come

It comes every year, and every year I think it will be better, or different. It is usually different but it is never better. I can’t explain how it is different this year. I’m wondering when it will no longer devastate me. When it will be less intense. When the sorrow will stop stalking me. When, in the midst of all the memories of all that I lost, I will not feel so helpless to the emotions that always come.

“It is useless for me to describe to you how terrible Violet, Klaus, and even Sunny felt in the time that followed. If you have ever lost someone very important to you, then you already know how it feels, and if you haven’t, you cannot possibly imagine it.”
Lemony Snicket, The Bad Beginning

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